Bye Bye November, Hello December!

There are three-four things I used to look forward to in November. Two holidays where I had the day off of work, my dad's birthday and black Friday.

Under the government contract I work for, I don't get Veteran's Day as a Federal holiday? Who screwed up that one? Not me. The building was closed and I had to either work at home or mark off one of my vacation days to get paid. I chose the later.

Thanksgiving was so weird this year. It was the first year in which my son was the one working in the day and I was working at night. And because of that, our schedules weren't synced up and when I got up the next day after working until midnight, I was hungry for breakfast at 10AM. So I made ham and eggs. And then I started cooking the Thanksgiving meal soon after so it was done at around 2PM. Neither I nor my son was hungry at that time, so I packed it up to be placed in the refrigerator. We grazed on Thanksgiving foodstuffs for about 4 days until it was all gone.

I had to work on black Friday and I wasn't really in the shopping mood. If there is actually a shopping mood. Whatever that's supposed to feel like. But still, I know that it is gift giving season so I need to buy something for someone.

At work, we organized two potlucks...one at Halloween and another right before Thanksgiving. The first one I ate some Vietnamese food and it did a number on my guts so I was running to the restroom for nearly half of the shift. I don't know if it was because it was greasy food, or just ingredients that my guys just don't digest any more or the fact that it sat out for hours before we ate. Maybe it was a combination of the three, but anyways, I felt horrible after that, so when Thanksgiving time rolled around and them the team were asking was it O.K. with me to have a potluck again, I was like yeah, it's OK, but it's too much food for me right before Thanksgiving, so you guys go ahead and I'll just eat my dinner (whatever I brought that day. I've been eating fruit for dinner because that's what I can tolerate.... like banana or orange or peach. Apples anymore are too fibrous.)

I had a somewhat strange conversation with my manager on Thursday. You see, each day I'm getting feedback to relay to the team and I'm supposed to be tracking all of it on a spreadsheet so we agreed on Thursday, but then she told me with the volume of work going through the team the number of problems is expected. But it just makes me feel bad that we are having any at all and I told her it felt like, "What now?" and a stab in the heart when she does it. Because maybe I expect more of myself and the team. But anyway, she asked me if I had any questions, and I said we get all these emails asking for help finding stuff and I don't know where to go or even start to look so I feel like the "dots are not connecting". And then she tells me that the first shift supervisors she leans on hard which is kinda baffling to me because the manager has been there for over 10 years and the supervisor has been there for just 5. So what is really going on here and how is it that a clerk turned supervisor gets all these knowledge and not the manager? Blah Blah Blah work, right? Anyway, I'm supposed to have yet another scheduled training session with the first shift supervisor for a week this time to see if I can get the dots that I'm missing. But now I'm thinking that if I'm missing this training, that they didn't follow through with the last training plan, that maybe I should be putting the trainer on notice instead. Otherwise, my relationship with the first shift supervisor might deteriorate.

And now it's December. So I went on Facebook this weekend, the first weekend of December to find out that The Alley is closing. And it's not an unexpected closing, because the pattern of what was happening with the store, but it's sad. The two generation family that ran it once, is retiring, so it's going away. The last store is in Indio or Palms Springs. And it made me thought of the fact that when I went to their store when the closest one to me as in Rancho Cucamonga, I picked up a business card while I was making a purchase. And I had that business card in a pile of other business cards in one of the desk drawers where I have my computer stationed. So I pulled out the pile of cards and went through them because it was OK that I threw away the card to The Alley because that was a store that was going out of business. I actually threw a bunch of them away until I came to one from Peer Development.

I acquired that business card from a guy I dated briefly in 2005? His life was in flux after a divorce, I remember mine was in flux, but don't remember the event other than I thought it was around the same time when my dad died. I googled his name from time to time thinking he died because the excuse he gave me to get out of our relationship was that his lung cancer metastasized and he was selling his house and moving after a nasty divorce, blah blah blah his drama. But I remember years later he calls up at home and I said I thought you were dead, and he asks me about a 3-some out of the blue says his receptionist is a fat slob and doesn't look as good as me. What? Yeah, that's men in a nutshell right there. Women want substance and to be taken care of and to get a feeling of security and men want good looks and somewhere in the process time, aging and the lack of motivation and energy fucks that all up. And at that time I told him to lose my number and never call me again. So yeah, I find his business card and I googled his name and low and behold he didn't die (so was his cancer story all a lie?). It seems he may have burned his bridge in the commercial restaurant remodeling biz, as well as mine, and moved on to people's homes and did a crap ass job of that because there are these reports online that people want to sue him for the lack of quality in the jobs that were performed. I had to laugh because he never did any of the work himself. He had a group of Mexicans working for him for cash probably, I don't know for sure. They painted his home before it was sold and rented back to him. Years later, I remember seeing that someone was shot dead at the same address he used to live at. And I'm thinking that place had bad karma - juju. It just always felt cold and never homey. Maybe that was just the bad energy left over from his divorce in the house. So do I want to track this guy down? No, not in the least seeing all the stuff written about him after I gave him up for dead but isn't it interesting to see the wormhole you can go down just by one doing inquiry on the internet from finding an old business card.

You know the good thing about December, besides Christmas and New Years Day? December 21st or there abouts is the Winter Equinox. The day with the shortest daylight. It only gets brighter longer from there, baby. It's the upswing for spring and summer. And that day is almost exciting to me as Christmas. 19 dark days and counting.

My Birthday

Yesterday was my birthday and it was hot as Hades so I did pretty much nothing all day except for trying to stay cool. I did make a quick run to Stater Brothers in the AM for provisions before it got hot, and bought a new air cooker on QVC (happy birthday to me), otherwise I cleaned and hung out with my cat for the day.

I can't believe I'm 50. 50! Yesterday was also Father's Day which reminded me that, yes I was born on that day and I miss my dad so much.

I was scheduled to get a B12 shot on Friday, but decided to move it up to today (Monday) because when I started to Uber drive today picking up people, my hands were tingling and my one eyelid was starting to twitch, a sure sign I'm B12 deficient. I did 5 pick-ups/drop offs, logged out and then called for an appointment. After that, I went to Go Bananaz and bought a bowl of Dole whip and topped it off with coconut and strawberry boba. YUM!

The Look of Love

So I went to Costco after dropping my son off at work on Saturday afternoon and fueling up at Costco gas. My goal was to buy more of their Kirkland brand lean ham luncheon meat. After retrieving a cart, I entered the store and made my way to the aisle when it's sold in the refrigerator case aisle. I don't know if it was on sale or not, but they were giving out samples which was welcomed.

After retrieving the ham from the refrigerator, I turned my cart around and attempted to travel back past the corner I came from to get back to the main hall and when I did, briefly, (the next sequence of events happened in seconds, mere moments) I couldn't move my cart forward because some kids were in the way blocking me with a cart of their own. I then looked up and off to the left I saw a man - a tall man with light skin, long brown wavy hair with his back to me looking off to the right - could have been a doppelganger for thinner Bradley Cooper. I may have sighed seeing this attractive male specimen, but again barely could move forward. And then another man, a Persian man, off to my right must have seen the look of love in my eyes and introduced himself to me as Joe after saying to me, "You've got beautiful eyes." I didn't feel beautiful, rather a hot sweaty mess. It was almost 100 degrees outside, and I had my hair up in a ponytail, was dressed in a tie-died tank top and 3/4 black pants and black Skechers, no socks. I could only assume he thought I was Persian, too, his mistake. And then, the most unwelcomed event happened after I gave him a cursory look to acknowledge where the conversation came from... an unattractive man in his 50-60's, overweight with severe acne scars all over his face, he asked me to dinner. I couldn't barely hear him over the noise of the group of people I was standing next to listening to a blender demonstration and told him, "I don't understand what you're saying". His reply: I'm not a killer, I'm just a human being. A major creepy feeling swept over me like I was unsafe even in the mass of humanity shopping around me inside Costco on a saturday afternoon. I scurried away into the crowd and didn't look back.

Dear Diary 03/06/2015

Dear Diary,

I don't think anyone really reads this blog unless they *really* know me or trip over it while scanning for something to read in general on Blogger being nosy and peaking into others lives or even living vicariously through them, so here it goes.

Yesterday was the last day of my physical therapy. It was twelve sessions of a routine structured by my physical therapist in order to gain back the flexibility and strength in my left wrist. My left hand is still weaker than the right one, always has been, but I've got full flexibility and can move with no pain which were the main goals.

So along with doing this routine, I have unexpectedly been getting to know my physical therapist.

On the first day, he seemed excited that he met me... a woman who was around the same general age he was and he started to talk about moving to Irvine and how bad-bad-bad the traffic is driving around LA. And then, whether he realized it or not, he insulted me and my decisions about morality. "What in the hell...", and "Where does he get off...", was the running through my mind as I was hooked up to the electric muscle stimulator/ice pack wrap for the next 20 minutes. I couldn't just walk out, I didn't want to create a scene in the therapy room by ripping off the pack and electrodes as I already did that online by writing a bitchy review on Yelp.com about deceitful practices, wait times and patient privacy in the clinic. In my mind, I knew I had a finite time for therapy and then I wouldn't have to deal with Mr. Insensitive ever again.

Most of the time when there were other patients in the PT room, I'd just sign in and do this routine: stretch on the tabletop both ways, twist the red rubber rod both ways, exercise my fingers to gain strength with devices that look like clothes pins, wrist rolls with 1 and then 2 lbs weights (100 reps each way, front, back, and vertical), wall push-ups, picking up and putting down a weighted wooden box, then 10 minutes on full body cycle. After other patients left, he'd talk to me more and more.

And like I stated before, yesterday, was the last day of therapy. He talked about his HAMP refinance, his interest rate, his sister, his parents, his friends marriage and how his wife doesn't cook or clean, snow in Utah, San Francisco, Texas, the bonus money he got by working in Texas, taxes and deductions, eventually moving to Seattle, his parents and the fact that he's working on Torrance per diem this weekend. I'm not a psychologist, I'm a human. If people feel the need to talk to me, I'm a good listener. I'm not sure if it sunk in that I'm not going to be coming to therapy anymore with this guy. I asked for a printout reflecting that I went to all of my therapy session so show my employer. And we said our goodbyes and he said he would see me on the 17th when I have my appointment with the Ortho doctor, which confused me. I asked if he'll be at the appointment, and he said he's be here.

With all of these discussions, I feel like I'm getting sized up for a bigger role in his life as though he he's interested in me and wants more than just the therapist/patient relationship, but hasn't directly expressed this to me. Why do guys send out signals like this?

Happy New Year!

I took time off of work since the 1st hoping that my wrist would feel good enough in order for me to complete the flooring project, but that thought seems like the joke's on me to get that project done. I'm still wearing the splint all the time (except in the shower) and I have a follow-up appointment with the orthopedist on 01/06.

On 01/05, I'm renewing my notary commission. It's an all day affair with state mandated education seminar and then a proctored exam immediately afterwards.

I stayed up New Years Eve and watched the ball drop on tv trying to stay warm. It actually snowed in Southern California the night before so I had to crank up the heat to be comfortable.

Stephen decided to walk home from work in the worst storm of the year and he's been sick ever since.They've been passing around the flu at his work for weeks.

For Christmas, while running Stephen to work and then picking him up at the wee hours of the morning because Walmart was open 24 hours a day between Thanksgiving and Christmas ans he was working graveyard, I bought a Sam ham fir the first time. And I'm happy to say it was pretty good. After eating on it for three days, Stephen made 16 bean soup out of the rest of it in the crock pot.

Before Christmas, I sent my couch, club chair and ottoman to the upholsterers because I couldn't stand the peeling top grain leather anymore. The set was in good shape otherwise. The fabric choice I made from their swatch book turned out to be discontinued and I really didn't like their alternate suggestions (not to mention the $18 per yard price tag), so I took it upon myself to locate and buy upholstery fabric I liked. It was something I've never had to do before, so I did some research online and found three of the biggest, oldest places to investigate. On my first try, I went to Dorrel Fabrics and found a great one for $15 a yard and bought the whole roll and dropped it off at Pete's a week ago at my lunch hour. A few days later, Eddie texts says the are working on the sofa asking me asking about the side details, and I said forget them. I can't wait to get it back.

Too Hot

It is so hot and humid in California today, it's almost unbearable. Have you ever seen a  pre-school little girl hold up her dress to cool off? Picture me doing that in my house today. The fans in each room are not cutting the humidity unless you're sitting directly in front of the breeze.

Yesterday wasn't much better. I ate light in the AM and around lunchtime, drove to Commerce to look at LVP flooring. I have to replace the 15 year old carpet and my choice is to go the vinyl plank route. Why?

1. It's a DIY easy to install project
2. It's nano silver infused, so it's super sanitary
3. Even though Lumber Liquidators is in the neighborhood, I didn't like the products they were offering.

So I picked up this white washed oak color that is just what I was looking for. Light, clean, and thick at 5mm and at the aforementioned Lumber Liquidators? They only had one choice that was vinyl plank at 5mm. I feel like I got a good deal. I almost bought the entire pallet. I may go back this coming weekend and buy the rest so my whole house can be floored in that product.

As nice as carpet is under foot, it's just a seething, filthy, smelling mess after 15 years of use.

I don't remember when the weather has been so strange as California goes. There were lightning strikes near the beach in Venice, Palos Verde and Catalina...

http://online.wsj.com/articles/man-dies-after-lightning-strikes-14-in-california-1406519232

This Halloween is not like all the others

My thoughts and prayers go out to all those on the East coast dealing with the effects of Hurricane Sandy.

The greater tri-state area was hit hard. Some places harder than hard. Some people lost everything. The NYC MTA was crippled by the flooding. The stock market was closed for two days.

Shake it Baby, Shake it

I like summer. I wish I had the time to take it off.  Maybe I'll just take a long weekend and go to San Diego... Anyway, with the temperature change this week from moderate to hot-hot-hot (at least in my mind anyway) earthquakes have come to Southern California.

I said this at work: Who needs Yorba Linda anyway? Oh, so the presidential library shifts around a bit and some dust falls off of Nixon's old books. Who cares.

Here's the link for the USGS - happy earthquake tracking peoples:

http://earthquake.usgs.gov/earthquakes/shakemap/list.php?x=1&n=sc&y=2012

Three earthquakes just today (so far).

Oh, so now it's summer...

Mr. Sunshine finally decided to get off his ass and show up to the party this week in the Golden state. I don't know why the weather is so damn screwed up this year, but it's off and everyone's allergies are acting up. There is not one day that goes by without sneezes, sniffles or noses being blown in my office. That is one thing I hate about working in a cubicle farm - close proximity to sick people I cannot escape.

I went to see "Magic Mike" a couple of weeks ago with a couple of ladies from work. It was OK, not as much skin as I thought a male stripper movie would have and too much love story. It had a lot of hype the weekend it opened, and now- nothing. I was shot in Tampa... there is a distinct look about a Florida sky. I think a few of the scenes in the movie... like partying out on a sandbar and throwing a hurricane party are kind of lost on those people that don't know that is what it's like in Florida.

Having July 4th in the middle of the week this year sucked.

This past weekend, someone else rear-ended my SUV on the freeway. Nice, huh? My car's not even a year old and I get hit again. I'm starting to feel like I've got a target on my back. The other vehicle? Crumpled. Mine? A trim panel fell off of the bumper and that bumper it also scratched up.

What else??

Rain? Again? Seriously?

If April showers bring May flowers, Southern Californians should all have bouquets of flowers in their yards this year. Last weekend, the weather casters said Wednesday it would rain. Well, it rained Monday. Then it was cold. then it was hot. Then it looked like rain again last night, Wednesday. It's Thursday and it's still raining.

I know it's nothing I can control, I only have to deal with it.

With purple raincoat in tow,
Judi.

I'm not so perfect after all

To be honest I never was perfect. Nobody is. Perfect is subjective. At work, I have been auditing the data that goes into a database and it was hell as well as heart wrenching to find out that even with all my diligence, it's not right. I am but a conduit to the errors that come from other people in other departments. As my boss would say, "garbage in / garbage out". I suspected there was a problem. My mood was down-to-work and focused as much as I could bear without literary wanting to scream at the top of my lungs in order to release my frustration. Once it was turned in, I couldn't get it to signed off quick enough and then the client started calling me.

And then after I could clear my head of the most important self-audit I performed for work, then that's when I decided that there was no qualified candidate applying for the vacant supervisors position and dreading that I would have to either train a co-worker or someone from the outside who has had supervisor experience but that would be useless to the 'processors' in the department, I applied.

My interview was Thursday with HR. I left my competition in the dust. My resume is so linear and focused, pretty much any company who was looking for what I do would at least take a look at it. There is good and bad with any job that you do, but in this new role, I bring more knowledge, technique and experience than the sum of my competition. Besides, it would be easier to hire a business analyst to do what I do with that database  than clone me.

It could be considered mid to late January and now it finally feels like winter in Southern California. Supposedly, it's another "La Nina" year, so we are anticipating a lot of rain. Well, at least there were showers for the past two days.

2012 also has brought me a new role with the HOA... that of the Treasurer. Our past one just turned 90. 90! She was still making deposits of laundry money... rolls of quarters. If you don't do it once a week, that damn bag gets heavy. I have a canvas bag I sling over my shoulder for the task. Paying the bills are entirely another story. The president is a bore. Blah blah blah, no action, blah blah, rule breaker, blah blah blah. He doesn't do the walk throughs. He doesn't fix anything. The budget is screwed up because of the foreclosures. It's frustrating. I need to figure out ways to cut back because he surly isn't doing it.

More later.

SO WRONG!

I know April showers bring May flowers, but this is ridiculous. It's been raining on and off for days now and this weekend looks like more rain is on it's way. I think Mother Nature is going to forget Spring and jump right into Summer with reckless abandon. I hope.

No Rain

The weather this week has been strange. Yesterday, it was cold as hell - in Southern California standards, that is. It was in the high 40's to the low 50's last night. High school friends living in Yucaipa complained of the snow ruining their fruit trees. That alone makes me glad I left. I hate being cold. I visited the snow just once as a little kid. I can't remember who took me, but I think it was my mom. She pulled off of the road and I remember getting out of the car and my feet crunching in the newly fallen snow, then the cold hit me and I was done. My day in the snow took all of 10 minutes.

Today, it's bright and sunny. My one cat was so happy she could go outside again, she talked me into it. I lounged on the chaise on my patio in the sun for awhile. It got too hot for yesterday's uniform I threw on again this morning... white Mickey Mouse sweatshirt, grey sweatpants and powder blue Uggs.

Beginning on Monday, work goes into overdrive. There was a final vote on Friday and the vote was go-go to move the vast majority of our first lien mortgage loan servicing activities to another company. I've already marked FHA loans as such. I think we're getting a whopping 22 days total to get it accomplished. My manager asked about my vacation plans again and I told him I'm coordinating with my cousins to make the trip. Vacationing in NewYork. I think I will be traveling there right before Octoberfest in Germantown. Something to look forward to besides trolling for headstones of my ancestors.

[Photo Credit: Dominic Grisafe, April 2011]

Damn Wind

It was cold and windy today. So windy in fact, there was a damn wind advisory for Southern California. And so cold, I decided to drive to work instead of taking the train. Fuck freezing on those damn platforms. Not me. When the weather warms back up again, that's when I'll take the train again to work. 60 degrees or more: OK for train travel, 55-60 degrees: questionable, 55 degrees or less: hell no. There are no heaters on the train!

I took a wrong turn off of the 105 freeway today and because of the way the traffic is so highly controlled around LAX, I found I couldn't make a u-turn until I was all the way in Culver City. By that time, I could turn left. Then I had to back track back to El Segundo through parts of Culver City, Westchester, Marina Del Rey, Playa Del Rey, past Loyola Marymount University and somehow found my way onto Vista Del Mar (right above the beach but it's not PCH) which turned into Highland and intersects with Rosecrans which is where my office is off of. My "detour" added an additional 20 miles to my commute, I'm sure. I walked into the office 5 minutes before 8AM.

There is only thing I hate worse than being cold and that's the wind. I moved from Fontana to get away from the damn wind. Maybe I need to move to a biosphere where there's no damn wind. Or outer space, where no one can hear you scream about the damn wind because there is none.

I think the wind was even affecting my co-workers. Everyone was all yelling and shit and I hate that. You don't have to yell at work. The normal level of noise is good enough. Sometimes, I have to remind then to simmer down because they do get all worked up about this or that. Just fix it and shut the hell up.

Damn, it's cold

Old man Winter showed his face today in California and damn, it's cold. It won't even be 60 degrees today and the nights are in the high 30's to low 40's. I slept with the heater on all night.  If I don't my throat gets soar.

Sunny Days Ahead

California weather equates to hot, wet, windy and cold. For example, when the rest of the country is experiencing fall, we are all hot and windy. When it's a winter wonderland up in the north and east, we are cold and wet. That's about the gist of it and it's been that way for as long as I can remember.

You have to understand that to a California naive such as myself, anytime the temperature falls below 70, we are cold. You will still be able to find diehards wearing shorts and flip flops, but even they are complaining about the cold and the wet and how it screws up their planned outdoor activities. I mean, the beach becomes a pretty useless place on a rainy day. And don't get me started about how everyone simultaneously forgets how to drive when it rains. That is a joke in and of itself, but I digress. I think winter is just about over here in California. The worst of it ran for about two weeks when it was rainy and cold. Today is December 30th, a Tuesday, and its 72 degrees in the valley where I work. It might rain a couple more times before January '09 is gone, but without the cold like before, I can handle it.

Also, I noticed that December 21 unceremoniously passed me by this year. It's a good day to me because it marks the winter equinox; the day of the year with the shortest amount of sunlight. Every day after that until June 21st, we are on the upswing in the amount of daytime sunlight we get right on through spring. That makes me happy. That gives me something to look forward to.

We share stories

As humans, we share stories not only so we have something to talk about, but sometimes to impart knowledge on others so they can learn from our mistakes.

I love my boyfriend, but sometimes he can be a bit of a knucklehead and steadfast in his ways. This behavior comes from his personal experience which I cannot fault him for because we like what we like and we like what we are familiar with and what works - we are practical people that way, but also from age. So when he felt he wasn't getting the quality medical treatment he deserved and needed, he went home to Seattle to see his doctor, a man who had treated him before for ulcers.

When he left for WA, I believe it was his intention only to stay for a few days in order to rest, run tests at his doctors and receive a new course of treatment. But it seemed that the longer he stayed, the worse the weather got and that got me worried. By the time he was granted permission to go home, the worse winter storm in ten years had settled onto the west coast and he was stuck in it. First, his flight was cancelled. Then once he got onto a plane, he was diverted to Portland, OR because of bad weather. I guess there are worse place to be stuck in during a snow storm, like Buffalo. Eww.

Finally, yesterday he called me to say he made it home after traveling in bad weather on the west coast for the past four days. What an ordeal. I'm a trooper when it comes to things going bad and taking it in stride, but I don't know how congenial I would have been in this situation. If it wasn't for the torrential snowfall, my co-worker and I agreed that my boyfriend could of driven back to California faster than the airlines were transporting him. I'm just happy to have him back in one piece.

More fire...

Now the fire is visable from my office as it creeps over the Santa Susana pass. The smoke is now blowing over the city of Simi Valley and is beginning to permeate the a/c system.

I was left with a quarter of a tank of gas after I arrived to work this morning, so at lunch I went and gassed up knowing that my trek home tonight is going to be probably longer than it has ever been before.

Southern California Fires in Los Angeles County

See: Fire in Porter Ranch

At 10:30 AM today, the hills above Porter Ranch at Oat Mountain, the tallest mountain in the Santa Susana mountain range, began to catch fire as the smoke and embers from the Marek fire rapidly move over the San Fernando Valley towards the ocean blown by the gusty, dry Santa Ana winds. This fire is now known as the Sesnon Fire.

Right now, the 118 freeway, the one I travel on to get to work and home is open but closed at the 210, which is north of where I travel. I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to get home using my normal route tonight. I might have to take the 405 south to get back to Orange County.

A Change in the Weather

Summer decided to creep out of town quietly after Labor Day while the morning fog and overcast began to roll in daily. It's been that way for about a week now. Friends and co-workers alike are complaining about all the hot and cold changes. You have to wear a jacket or a sweater in the AM, but by lunch you need to peel it off because the fog and overcast has burned away by then and it's kinda feeling humid. I don't like it at all.