Sadness

The last time I blogged here, little did I know that my Aunt Jane's fight for life was over due to the ravages of diabetes. This is the message I received on Facebook from my cousin Cate...

               "Judi... hopefully this will reach you...Your Aunt Jane has died. She had a stroke a 

                   week and a-half ago and slipped into a coma on the 26th. She was brain dead last

                   Friday (May 3rd), and they removed her feeding tube at that  time. She died 2AM 

                   Wednesday(May 8th)."

This is very much how my father died. And it bothers me that such a little thing as elevated blood sugar can do so much damage to the body. It bothered me so much that I talked to my new doctor when I had my initial consultation after I changed over to Kaiser health insurance. You know what he said after I discussed my family's history diabetes?

                                          "Don't get fat, don't get fat, don't get fat!" 

If it's as simple as that for most American's, why aren't we more vigilant about what we eat and staying active after 40?

When I got back to work after hearing the news, I told my manager who then said that I've got to go back to New York for the funeral and out of my mouth came, "It's my family, I've got to." After all, Aunt Jane made the effort to come to my mom's memorial, so I had to attend hers.

I flew into Newark Airport (EWR) on Sunday. It took two hours driving in the dark to get to Poughkeepsie. On Monday, I drove up to Red Hook to visit my mom's/grandparent's grave site and pulled the vines off of the headstones. I thought about collecting more photos of headstones, but I really wasn't into it on that day, so I left my camera in the car and headed back to the hotel, but not before going to the grocery store for provisions.

Tuesday was the funeral. I stayed downtown, so the funeral home wasn't too far from the hotel.  It was very Catholic and with the splashing of the holy water onto the corpse, her priest said a few poignant things plus verses from the Bible and then read what my cousin Tina wrote. After that, whomever wanted to follow the casket in the procession line to the cemetery did so, minding the traffic signals, but still driving behind the hurst with our emergency blinkers on. Aunt Jane is buried with Uncle Frank who passed in 2002 in section 24 in the back rows of St. Peter's Cemetery in Poughkeepsie, NY.

Wayne and Tina arrange for a meal at a local private boating club on the banks of the Hudson River. We stayed and talked a bit, but really I was kind of in a daze from the jet lag and time change

Suddenly...

Jane Marie Fulford Metrando

July 7, 1929 - May 8, 2013

Suddenly, I found myself on the receiving end of a Facebook message from my cousin telling me my Aunt Jane had passed away. I don't know why, in all of my family discussions, everyone always referred to her as 'my' aunt, but she was. First born of four girls. The one in the family that lived her life on her terms in more ways than one. My mother's oldest sister.

Suddenly, I found myself saying those same words to my manager who then replied, "She's family- you have to go (to the funeral in New York)". There was no question in my mind I had to go because Aunt Jane gave at least that respect to my mother when her ashes were buried in New York in 2010, I just didn't see myself traveling back to the east coast so soon after vacationing in Virginia with my Aunt Tressa and Uncle Frank six short week ago.

Just as suddenly, thirty minutes online and a credit card placed my trip in motion. Plane tickets to Newark, a Hertz rental car, a room in Poughkeepsie.

I flew in on Sunday. Visited my mother's grave on Monday and pulled some vines off of my grandparents adjacent headstone. Went to the funeral on Tuesday. Flew back home on Wednesday.

Match.com 2013 Update

Today I've completed my fourth month on Match.com and just last weekend was my first date with a guy who's very much like me which is cool. We went to the Peterson Automotive Museum and then to lunch.

Last night, I logged in to see if I had any responses and check on my six month guaranty to find that I was 3 emails and one day away from missing the cut.

So talking about this at lunch today, my cheapskate lunch date made it a point to say in an indirect way that if I'm paying for this service (or otherwise don't waste your money), why not take advantage of it and made me promise to send three emails. I did it. I did it just so I can have the opportunity to get my money back.