Lots of things have been running around in my head this past month. Like how I've got to buckle down at work because pissing people off is not going to make them see things my way. Like how I feel so free now that both of my parents have passed on. Like how anything I do, good or bad, pass or fail is really only meaningful to me whatever it may be. And like how I really need to liquidate all the crap of my mom's I stuffed into a storage unit. Sell-sell sell.
And just when I thought things were going to get nice and boring for a good long while, Pancho pokes his head above the huddled masses after years of no contact and wants to meet me for lunch. But it's not lunch. And I'm on his menu. I know I should be flattered, but instead I'm slightly repulsed. It's a strange feeling to have. I don't want to be used, I want to be loved. I guess that's what I'm shooting for and he's not it. He's Mr. Right Now and not the right guy for me.
I'm not dating right now. I've got too much crap to take care of. I need to get back to my happy place and I'm not working towards that right now. Kinda just marching in place.
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